Why blame the mother?

The article" Blaming Mothers: A disability perspective" presents a tradition that been present in  

schools for many years: if a child has a disability, the mother is always blamed for any problems the 

child has. According to the author, there are four kinds of " blame the mother" strategies used by 

school districts: 
  •  Blaming the mother for incompetence includes criticizing the mother for having " only the basic skills,and the ideas suggested by the mother are not given credit.
  •  Blaming the mother for working outside of the home; school districts claim that mothers who work do not spend enough time with their child and expect parents to help children on a full time basis
  • Blaming the mother for being too passive: mothers tend to agree at first to the district's educational recommendations, by the time they realize they need to file a complaint, it may be difficult to convince the hearing officer that the education is inadequate.
  • Blaming the mother for being too assertive: mothers are considered too"pushy", and is blamed for interfering  with the teacher's and aids' ability to provide instruction to the student.
The author suggests the following solutions:
  • Teachers' schedules should be designed in a way that allows more cross-collaboration
  • As teachers we should ensure that mothers are treated fairly and with dignity, don't be afraid to speak up
  • Schools can use teacher training periods to teach how to write effective IEPs and how to incorporate principles of universal design into the classroom
Although the article introduced me to a topic that I was not very familiar with it,but in my point of 

view from the moment of pregnancy mothers are blamed for children's difficulties, at home or at 

school.

In the article, the author  claims that poor mothers are often blamed when they deliver low- birth 

weight babies making it clear this is also a class implication, too. In many circumstances, mothers 

efforts to provide the best to their children is not given credit , for example doctors still distrust mothers 

to appropriate decisions for the well being of the child, if a child is born with a disability the mother 

may be blamed for not taking care of herself or the child during pregnancy. It's clear that tradition of  

"blaming mothers" is not only present in schools, yet at home and hospitals. 

Lastly, an interesting thought that came to mind is about :The Individuals with Disabilities 

Education Act. The act promises "free" and "appropriate"and public education for each child.

However, how can the education be "appropriate" if mothers' voices are not heard in many special 

education cases?

The words" free" and "appropriate"signify that schools have the responsibility to ensure that every 

child is educated. Yet, the "blame the mother" tradition is placing the responsibility on the mother, not 

on the school district. 

Overall this article made me reflect on mothers' role in children education,and how it is not being recognized in today's society. 



Comments

  1. DenaMarch 13, 2018 at 3:56 PM

    Hi Marcia, I think you did nice job of summing up what blaming the moms is about. I don't think it is fair of the school districts to blame the mom for being incompetent for only having basic skills. No one ever knows what greatness can be born to that child, regardless of the mother's circumstances. Look at an icon such as Ben Carson, who was the first African-American surgeon to successfully separate twins conjoined at the head. He and his brother were born to a mom who was illiterate and had only basic skills. She had to work a full time job cleaning houses to support her two sons a single mother. We should never under estimate some ones' purpose here on Earth because of the standards in the education system. It our duty as educators to help advocate for our students and their families whenever there is an injustice or at least guide them towards resources that will help them. The education system is not always equitable and just in serving the best education to minority students, from two parent households or single parent households. Some of these inequities may be in blaming the parents for their lack of support, or even in segregating the schools. The students should have equal access to a good education.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Heidi FoxMarch 16, 2018 at 1:11 PM

    Hi Marcia,

    The article you read sounds really interesting and totally relevant. Certainly, mothers are disproportionately the ones to receive blame. Why is that? Is it because historically they have managed the home environment, including the care of children... women gather near the home while men hunt farther away, so to speak? Or is it because, as you said, women are responsible for the growth and development of a child in utero? And what about the fathers? There are so many absent fathers who don't get blamed for their lack of presence, because they aren't around to receive blame. Are women viewed through a deficit lens because they are stereotypically the "weaker" of the two sexes? In the snow day article I read: Dis/ability critical race studies (DisCrit): theorizing at the intersections of race and dis/ability, the authors assert that race and dis/ability are socially thought of as deficits within the asset vs. deficit framework and that the way racism and ableism shape notions of normalcy are interdependent. Seems like the same can be said for sexism.

    Heidi

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  3. Victoria RestlerMarch 19, 2018 at 7:26 AM

    Thanks for your post Marcia. I am particularly interested in your comment, "but in my point of

    view from the moment of pregnancy mothers are blamed for children's difficulties, at home or at

    school." And I agree! The way that society polices motherhood from the moment of pregnancy--regulating what pregnant women should not eat or do--is striking. I also wonder how this kind of mother-blame bleeds over to teacher-blame as well? Teachers, who are disproportionately women also receive significant blame (or credit) for the challenges/ achievements of their students despite the very MANY factors that contribute to student learning and experience.

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